Shopping - the TMI version

So, summer swooped in overnight, leaving me - of course - with nothing to wear. On Sunday I have a "thing" that requires I look put together, mature, nice, a bit dressed up... you know, the kind of look not easily pulled off with yoga pants and a tank top.

I dragged my parents and my kids off for a "quick" shopping trip. Just wanted to hop into Old Navy since I have a gift card. All I needed was a skirt.

My shopping trip was not quick. But it was disturbing on so many levels.

First, Old Navy had no skirts. Huh? Apparently, this season, Old Navy has decided to concentrate its inventory solely on capri pants of every style and color. Weird. Has the world not seen enough capri pants?

So, off to Target, where things just got worse. At Target I learned that instead of buying new clothes, I could pay good money for things I wore in 8th grade. Like tiered skirts:
and lace leggings:
and worst of all, MC Hammer pants:
Okay, I know I'm getting old, but seriously?

Since I'm not a huge fan of tiered skirts and the mini-skirt/lace legging combo (which I AM a fan of) isn't appropriate for my "thing," I opted for a dress. I found one I liked - it fit me perfectly. Unfortunately, it comes with a sign that reads, "I've birthed multiple children." Oh wait, that was just my stomach pooching out.

After experimenting with how long I could hold my tummy in before I had to take a breath, my mom helped me come to grips with the fact that I have come to the point in my life where I need good (supportive, ugly) underwear. Gross.

Just another way for Motherhood to remind me what it's done to me. I'm not going to post a picture of this. In fact, I probably shouldn't hit "publish" at all.

Oh well, against my better judgment....